Youth Ministry is what has given me peace and helped me to find the one thing in life I know I was made for: teaching. I taught religious education at my former church to multiple ages while I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do. It has helped me find the beauty of the Church, deepen my faith, as well as led me to the strongest connections I have in Texas. Yet, I find myself wondering whether it is still my ministry.
The staff at my current parish is about to change. This staff change is not the reason that I am thinking about leaving youth ministry, but the transition made me realize I need to start figuring out what I want to be involved in. I'm not sure that I'm ready to commit to another year of it, and I am not willing to do it if I am not 100% in it. That's not how I roll. There are so many things that I could do, and I want to make sure that I am opening myself up to God's will rather than my own. It's entirely possible that I have been in youth ministry because I'm good at it, and it is feeding my ego rather than fulfilling God's will.
I do not have an easy answer to what is coming next, but I do know this: prayer is the answer. I have found myself so much more at ease since starting to discern mission work/religious life/third order life than I have ever been. Seriously, I have never been this at ease. A friend cut himself at my house and I was ridiculously calm. All of that is because of God's grace, and I know he will lead me to whatever it is I need to do. In fact, I'm pretty sure I already know it. I just have to admit it to myself!
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